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Head Lines:
Writings on Children and Education

Lean Into It

4/19/2017

6 Comments

 
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​​Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness….Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one's lifetime.
                                                                         –Mark Twain
​As I boarded my flight to Shanghai, China on a Friday morning recently, I was in a foul mood. I had been delayed two days by a mid-March snowstorm that Buffalo seems to specialize in every year, and truth be told, I was not looking forward to the trip in the first place. I was off for a two-week jaunt to the Middle Kingdom to recruit students for our school, it having recently started an international student program. While it was very important to our ever-diversifying school community that I go, I was going to miss the majority of spring break with my family in Florida. 

My foul mood was the result of three things really. One was the snow, as the delay meant I would miss a major recruiting event in China. This was a business trip after all. Two was missing R&R time with my family. But what was really bothering me was having to spend two weeks being uncomfortable. As an American, I am used to being comfortable and used to the rest of the world making me comfortable. (In earlier travels through Central America and Europe everyone spoke English with some competency and shared somewhat Western ways—it made things easy for visiting Americans.) 

But China would be different. There would be a complex and mysterious language and new cultural norms, and from what I heard and read, there would be lesser attempts by the locals to speak English or to understand my ways of thinking and being. I would have to adjust, and I could feel myself already taking up the position of the ugly American. Heck, I just finished three paragraphs complaining about a free trip across the globe. What’s uglier than that?

Additionally, I knew I would be eating food that at best I wasn’t interested in and at worst was totally grossed out by, and that I would be living among and interacting with people whose customs and traditions I didn’t understand (and perhaps worst of all didn’t want to understand.)

In short, I’m a huge hypocrite. I have spent my years as both an educator and father imploring my students and my children to be open to growth. I am consistently preaching the importance of leaning into discomfort and embracing failure as the pathway to growth--both personal and academic. 

But my attitude about this trip was all wrong. And it was based--like most instances of implicit bias--in ignorance and fear. I’m not proud of it and I don’t know how else to say it. But there it is. 

Luckily, I managed to get ahold of myself before I landed in Shanghai and promised myself I would embrace every experience that came my way on this trip. (Perhaps binge-watching the entire Harry Potter movies series on the 16-hour flight gave me renewed perspective. Who knows?) And I did.
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As it turned out, most of my preconceived notions about China were wrong. It was an amazing country with amazing people who wanted to know about me and my background and my experiences.
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It had incredible museums and architecture.
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It had uniquely delicious food (although I’m not sure I’ll yearn to try pig intestines again any time soon. Or in this lifetime.)
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And most importantly, it had amazing schools with great facilities and teachers and enthusiastic students who wanted to both share with and learn from me.
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​So as I sat in the Shanghai airport pounding a Whopper (rest assured I’ll never take you for granted or look down on you again, Burger King), and waited for my connecting flights to Florida to join my family on spring break, I can honestly say that this trip was life changing. I experienced people, culture, and food that was so foreign and uncomfortable, but yet so amazing. By following my own advice—by being open to growth and leaning into the discomfort—I made an unforgettable memory and grew as a person. It turns out living that advice is way better than giving it. 

You can check out a few more highlights from my trip below.
6 Comments
Barbara Hill
4/19/2017 04:41:10 pm

Thank you for sharing such a personal account of your rewarding trip to China. Hope it results in some eager new international students for EFS. China is definitely on my bucket list.

Reply
nancy ruff
4/26/2017 02:45:33 pm

WONDERFUL!!

Reply
Alice Sullivan Dillon . class of 1947
4/19/2017 04:43:43 pm

Dear Mr Deyell
I thoroughly enjoyed reading about your experiences traveling and visiting in a country new to you but so very old in its culture landscape and language.What a wonderful story for many of us who may also feel a bit wary of our various journeys no matter where they might lead us.I particularly appreciated your honesty. I am sure that the students coming your way have some of those same feelings and that judging by your openess (which you deny having), you will make them feel as welcome as you felt upon setting foot on that new -to you- soil. How fortunate you are to have tested the new land and found it not to be wanting. Education is a gift especially education through travel. Your photos tell it all. I know you will be looking for some Chinese restaurants as soon as the new students arrive but they also may like the Big Macs!!

Thank you for sharing your story . Best Alice Dillon

Reply
Bill & Sue Haugen, Lauren Levy grandparents
4/19/2017 08:50:55 pm

We both enjoyed your travel commentary. We do a lot of traveling and your comments and observations were wonderful. Elmwood Franklin is lucky to have you as head master.

Reply
Naomi
4/20/2017 08:16:21 am

I am glad you were fortunate enough to take this journey. I really want to stress journey, because it is just as vital you are open to learning about other cultures as concern from them learning about "you." You did state that several times in your journal. Please take back to Elmwood Franklin that it is just as important for the family of Elmwood Franklin to have a mutual challenge and regard for understanding the uniqueness and talents of other cultures. I do not know if you have intergrated in the curriculum's foreign language, Chinese, but it would be a worthy embracing for all!! Our American children need to see the value of being fully bilingual. That's when you can see through the lens of other cultures. That is just a beginning. I have four daughters, two out of the four are fully bilingual in another language. It has made them global. Both studied abroad and enjoyed every experience!! Both were hired in their new positions because they are bilingual. My daughter Chelsea Wooten Cerre is an alum of Elmwood Franklin. I am proud to say that her need and desire to dig deeper in a global fashion, opened her mind to different levels of understanding and passion. Again, use this opportunity to have mutual benefits.

Reply
Bonnie
4/25/2017 08:56:17 pm

Thank you for sharing your pictures and engaging commentary. "Its a Small World" from Disney has evolved into a truly small world. Our grandchildren have so much to look forward to. EFS is preparing them for this journey.

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    Head of Elmwood Franklin School Andrew Deyell shares with the EFS community—and the world—his thoughts on issues regarding teaching, learning, and family matters.

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